Thursday, June 19, 2008

Over My Dead Body!!

Literally!!! Billy knows that packed camper equals separation! He absolutely refuses to budge-- can't even tempt him with doggie treats! Frank has to drag his "deadweight" body to the house--then we must endure his plaintive wails and sad eyes pleading as we head out for an enjoyable vacation-- marred only by the guilt of leaving him behind!! (No room in car and he's not used to being chained, so going with us is not an option) Just in case you were wondering--

Thursday, June 12, 2008

Gone Camping!!

Wohoo-- on our way to Jellystone Camp with three grandchildren in Baby Jay-- our newly-purchased, yet to be used, mini tent trailer!!
(Att:Would Be Burglers-- Billy the ferocious man-eating dog will be guarding all doors, windows, etc.)And if his bite won't stop you,, flatulence will!!
Be back Sunday! Heavily sleep-deprived, but very happy to be making memories!

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

Time Capsules and Changing Wardrobes

Just planned to rearrange my closet, you know- move the heavy winter sweaters to a higher shelf, see if I could fit into any of last year's summer apparel--- vacume the dog hair- get organized-
It floated to the floor- I nearly sucked it up-- stopped in time-- went back to May 18, 2003 and another day of organizing and cleaning!
I searched voraciously in the aftermath-- for a clue, an explanation, a fragment, a trace-- I thought I had found , ingested, it all-- still starving-- He wasn't organized and his clothes were all over the floor--in a messy heap-- much as his last days-- As I reached the bottom, there it lay-- scribbled in pen on the back of a Sobeys grocery slip:
"In so many words, I offer my sincerest and heartfelt apology. If I Retain (?) this invisible weight, I will only become more afraid, and grow more despair(?) for myself each day. I plead and beg for a forgiveness whch my own heart tells me I do not deserve. Take this howerver you wish, but know that the writer is much too aware, to appease, or feign a false projection. The author has been exposed to the harsh elements of consequence, and (misdirection?) to find satisfaction in mere trickery. This dribble that has been written on th back of a Sobey's receipt stands as a time capsule. "
It is what it is----

Saturday, June 07, 2008

Walking Tips!!

Note to Self!!

Before embarking on walking trek around the lake you might want to keep in mind:

1. Don't drink your daily suggested serving of water just before leaving--- Elevator UP!!! doesn't work any more--- in fact it comes crashing down as I round the last corner and target toilet is within sight!!!

2. On Monday nights, you might want to choose the path less travelled,, through the woods, thereby avoiding Compost Bins and affiliated rank stench of rotting organics!!

3. And oh, as for air-drying your newly shampooed hair with that Suave coconut smell you love-black flies love it too!!!

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Made in China

I believe Elvis is dead and Princess Diana was the victim of a tragic set of unfortunate circumstances culminating in her death-- although the jury in my mind is still "out" on the deaths of JFK and Marilyn Monroe! So I wouldn't identify myself with typical conspiracy theorists----but lately,, I've been wondering ---Frank was almost done assembling the cheapie Zellers bought deck swing,, when he noticed a vital bolt was missing!! Zellers would not open a new box to supply the missing piece,, NO-- that would be too simple-- we (Frank) would have to dissassemble the swing and return the whole thing in its proper packaging--- &*%*^(--- He opted to buy a new bolt at the hardware store--
Yesterday while we were at Wal-Mart looking for a trampoline enclosure,, we spotted a combination trampoline-enclosure for less money than the safety net alone-- Just as we reached our decision to buy same,, along came a frazzled, frustrated mother, accompanied by a seriously worried looking clerk,, hoping we weren't waiting to buy that last trampoline combo, because upset mother needed it for the crucial post missing from her previously bought set-- kids were home disappointed,,, mother irate--- the trampoline needed that one last piece to be set up properly and they were not going to take it apart!! We understood-- she left with crucial missing piece from set-----So where am I going with this--- HMMM!! Maybe there is a Chinese conspiracy to drive us crazy!! One family at a time!! Beginning with toxic paint on our baby toys!! (I'm betting Wal-Mart sold the trampoline with the missing post to some unsuspecting consumer and this turns into the neverending story!)